Today was always going to be a roller coaster of emotion and I tried to hold it together.
When we walked into the Chemotherapy unit it was obvious I had straight away cut the average age by at least half. I could feel the other patients eyes on me, not only because I was new but my age had a big impact. This became more apparent when a lovely woman who had been sitting a few chairs away from me, with her husband came up to me and said “If you don’t mind me asking how old are you?”. I replied 31 she immediately replied quite forcefully ” you’ll be fine…you’ll be fine. My daughter was 31 when she was diagnosed and she is 34 now and shes fine, she had age on her side”. I was completely taken aback, and started to get upset, only because she was talking with such fight and determination.
The first drug Avastin was put through my vein over an hour and a half and my blood pressure monitored before, during and after. I then had some anti sickness before the Oxaliplatin was put through over 2 hours. The Oxaliplatin is the one that causes numbness and tingling when touching something cold, as well as difficulty swallowing cold drinks. My hand had the needle in it and I started to feel numbness and tingling all the way up to my elbow. Which I can still feel now and its quite annoying. I’ve been told it should wear off in a couple of days.
Whilst sitting for nearly 4 hours, I at least managed to get 2 chapters read of Fifty Shades of Grey. I only just started it and all the nurses and patients were talking about it. They kept coming over saying oh you have that book!!
A simple thing like just walking to the car mean’t that I had to cover my mouth to stop the cold air getting in my throat, which made my voice all crokey. It freaked me out. I’m feeling very overwhelmed at the moment and tired. I’m sure all I need is a good nights sleep and everything will seem a whole lot better in the morning.